Shannon K. Winston

C


After Claire Wahmanholm

Child, what did I know about being
a mother just last October?

C, as in chai—the drink in my hand,
chilling. Cinnamon, cloves.

Fall cresting with winter. Crawl closer,
child. The beginning of everything is small—

C, a sound like a seed—
C, caramel smooth. 

Child, what do you want to know
about your birth mother? 

We met in a diner off the turnpike
that November. Cadillacs and Chevys 

cruised out of the parking lot, 
heading West towards Chicago—

the city where I grew up.
Lake Michigan’s waters chilled 

my calves. Alone on the beach,
I had shivered. Could I love hard enough 

to be a mother? Clementines, cashews,
candy corn—the things I recall 

from my childhood. In your crib,
you curl into a cocoon. 

C is not how you begin the word seed,
but the beginning of everything is small. 

Coo with me, child.
Conspiring in the night, 

we watch constellations.
Cradling you, I crack open.



Back to Issue XV…


Rachel Becker’s poetry recently appears or is forthcoming in journals including North American Review, Post Road, Rust + Moth, West Trade Review, Wild Roof, Crab Orchard Review, and RHINO. She holds an MFA in Creative Writing from Lesley University and is a poetry editor for Porcupine Literary: a journal by and for teachers. She lives in Boston.